S1E18 - Stephanie Neutze: How to Simplify Your Life
Show Notes
A little about Stephanie:
East coast girl living in Los Angeles
Upbringing in religion leads to a spiritual awakening
Health crisis - leads to spirituality and searching for alternatives when western medicine fails you.
Saw an osteopath
Jennifer Pastiloff - gentle yoga class
Vision we have for ourselves. Comparing our vision to what is really there in reality.
We get stuck on how we think things should be.
A holistic lifestyle and spirituality can sometimes go hand in hand.
Using spirituality practices as a means to stay in busy mode as opposed to really doing the work. You keep researching and learning new things, but not always implementing those things.
Simplifying doesn’t necessarily mean deprivation or living without, but it may mean living more mindfully, leaning into what lights you up, and listening to the whispers of your heart.
Honing in on what you know to be true for you. Take what feels good and leave the rest.
Release judgement around what spirituality should look like. Strip away what you think it should look like and tap into what you want it to feel like.
Setting boundaries as a spiritual practice.
Simple Life Checklist
Setting boundaries
Joy - Focus on the feeling. How do you want to feel? Not just does it spark joy (Marie Kondo Konmari method). Don’t deny yourself, but be mindful of moderation and reasons behind where the joy is coming from.
Simplify not in terms of quantity, but in terms of adding value and benefit to your life.
Supportive and Nurturing - how fast does time go by? Being so present that you are unaware of time passing while doing the thing, being with the person, or being in the experience.
What is calling me deep within my heart? Rumi quote - “Let yourself be silently drawn by the strange pull of what you really love. It will not lead you astray.”
Creating/Child like play - “just because" type things. Stephanie does pottery.
When we lean into who we are, it’s amazing how supported you are. Also so challenging! Learning to trust!
Accountability buddies - support system of people (accountabili-buddies). Others who see you the way those who love you see you. Be you, be big, be bold! Not about codling, but truth telling. Ask for help you need. Takes courage to let them know when you’re struggling. Having a place to celebrate your wins, triumphs, and little brags. So much judgement in the world, to have people you can turn to who can genuinely celebrate you is awesome. Not just support, but celebrate your wins. Hold mirrors up for each other in good ways. Help people see themselves as they rise up.
Be in your worth. I deserve this, I earned this. When others can celebrate you in that, it’s awesome!
In learning about spirituality/wellness and becoming your true authentic self and learning to live a simple life. . .
Go through life, then need to shed layers of conditioning. That’s where we learn new ways of being through spirituality, wellness, and holistic practices. But then, sometimes, another shedding needs to occur. You can become conditioned again, but now in a spiritual way. Alex tried to become what a “spiritual person” should look like. She tried to look the part of a spiritual person. So she shed her conditioned layers from her early life, but then put on some more layers with trying to be “spiritual.” Then comes the simplifying - did all the research, tried the various spiritual and healing modalities, now you have to shed the layers of conditioning again to find the essence of who you are and what feels like a good fit for you and your life. Turns out it may not be any of the spiritual things you just learned! What practices bring out who you truly are and enhance your life. They may not be spiritual practices, but they can still be spiritual! Alex clung to the idea that in order to find her true self, she had to become an ultra spiritual person. She felt she had to emulate what a stereotypical “spiritual person” looked and acted like. Turns out that is not the way to go! You may speak a certain way and have certain beliefs, but it doesn’t align with your outward appearance or in the activities you take part in.
What is my body needing today? Is this a self imposed obligation or a choice I am making consciously because I want to do it? Stopping doing all things allows you to re-evaluate what things you are doing and why. You can then reintegrate things into your life based on whether they really matter and make you feel your best. Can do this every day. . . what do I need to do today. Doesn’t necessarily mean you need to integrate it into your everyday life.
I choose this. Stating this as you are doing it to see whether you really want to do it. Stay in your power. Give yourself authority over what you’re choosing to do.
Reasonable expectations - ones that I can meet without stretching myself thin.
Changing your mindset and behavior in terms of the way you view yourself and view the world. You’re tuning in and understanding more concretely what you say yes or no to and what you choose. Pouring your attention into the things that really matter.
Honoring your life. Honoring the process of being human and being yourself.
Goal of a simple life: to feel peace and at ease with what is.
Resources:
Under the Skin with Russell Brand and Brene Brown - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SM1ckkGwqZ
For Thought’s Sake S1E14 - Stress Manifesting in the Body
Marie Forleo - First book: Make Every Man Want You: How to Be So Irresistible You'll Barely Keep from Dating Yourself!
Marie Kondo - Konmari Method
